Celebrities????

I was really trying not to do this but I just can't keep it in anymore. I am watching "I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here and I can't take it. First of all they are using the term celebrity very loosely. I am pretty up on current pop culture and I have never heard of half of these people. And since when did being married to an impeached politician make you a celebrity? And Sanjaya? Come on! He is not a celebrity. He got voted off American Idol. So basically all you have to do is be on camera, for anything, and they will consider you famous. And Janice Dickinson? Gimme a break, she hasn't done jack since she has been there. Don't even get me started on Heidi and Spencer. Although, I was pretty shocked that Heidi actually ate the stuff they made her eat. A rat tail and three scorpions. Slightly impressed. But Spencer is a super douche! And I know that's what he wants everyone to say because he did say that he wants to be the villain. He also claimed that the crying Heidi did on the Hills was fake, so all I have to say is that if she is such a great actress, why not leave reality t.v. and do something you deserve to be famous for. Go act in an actual television show or a movie. CHALLENGE! Spencer needs to be knocked down a couple of notches.

I heard on the news too that Patti Blago was doing this because they needed the money, but tonight they said the winnings go to the charity of the winner's choice. So I don't know about that. Either way, it's a train wreck and I can't look away!

The Day After

Today is the day after my Grandma's funeral and it feels sadder than yesterday did. The last memory I have is watching my Grandma being buried and that's what I keep replaying in my head. I woke up this morning and got up and ate breakfast and then went back to bed. I woke up again at 1:00 and got up and showered. I was up for about two hours and then I went and laid in bed and just watched t.v. I don't know what the feeling is. I just felt really blah today, almost like I didn't know what to do with myself. I took today and tomorrow off of work thinking I would enjoy just lounging around but I am not enjoying it so much. I wish Todd and I could take a vacation, but we are trying to save all of our money for a house. But I think it would be good for us to get away for a week or so. Oh well, I am sure once I get back into the swing of things I will feel better. But I did check my work email today and that did not help my cause any. I have an out of office reply on and these reps keep emailing me even though it says to contact my manager. HELLO!!!! I am not in the office, so No, we can't get on a conference call to discuss anything. Don't read my out of office and then forward it to your boss to email me. Your boss is not going to make me be in the office all of a sudden. It says, "If you need immediate assistance please contact Jay Kovack". What don't people get about that??? Ugh! I can't even understand it. When my mom called and told me my Grandma died, I didn't know when the services were so I didn't put a date saying when I would return to the office. Just contact my manager for the love of everything that is good and holy!!!! But I can't change my out of office now because then they might figure out that I had checked my email....of course the chances of them figuring anything out are pretty slim! And I could just log on and work tomorrow but I am absolutely not going to do it. I never take any time off. This is my time, and I am allowing myself to have it. I would rather lay around and do nothing and feel nothing than sign on and have to deal with these people!!

Depressed

My Grandmother passed away Friday May 22. She was 98 years old. Over the last year she had started to deteriorate so her passing was a blessing. She wasn't the same person, she was in a nursing home and her body was giving out on her. Her mind on the other hand seemed like it wanted to keep going. My Dad would go see her every day, even if he could only stay for 10 minutes, and every day she told him she wanted to go home. She wanted to be on her own until the very end, but it just wasn't possible. I didn't cry when my mom called and told me she had passed, I knew it was better. I cried when my mom would call me and tell me about her visit to the nursing home. Hearing about her condition and how she looked made me sad. All I could hope was that they were keeping her comfortable and treating her like she was their own grandmother. My mind always wanders to those horrible nursing home stories you hear. But my mom and dad said it seemed like they were taking good care of her.

Tuesday was the wake. I have been to wakes before, but this one was so weird for me because this was the first death in my family that I can remember. My other grandparents died before I was born or I was too young to remember. First of all, she obviously did not look like herself. But it was so weird to stand there and look at her, and know that she is gone, and not to sound morbid, but that everything that was inside her is no longer inside her. And the makeup they put on them is so bad. I mean I know they do the best they can, but her hands just looked so bad. I didn't cry at the wake either. I teared up a little, but I just kept thinking, she was 98...she lived a long happy life.

Today was the funeral. Again, I was holding up like a champ. My dad asked me to read something, but I really, really didn't want to, but I was going to do it because it's five minutes out of my whole life. And if my dad wants me to do it, I will do it. Well he actually changed his mind and decided he wanted to do it. So I just told him to try and if he still needed me to go up and read something I would.

My dad gets up there, and at first he just stands there because he is tearing up...and then he looks at my mom, and my mom nods in encouragement. That is when I lost it. My parents have been married for over 50 years, and they can tend to be a little snippy with each other. Basically, they limit their interaction and can only go about 10 or 15 minutes before they start bickering. But this situation was different. My mom knew she had to be his wife and be supportive and it was awesome to see. I have never seen my parents like this and I can only hope that it lasts.

After the funeral we went to the cemetery. They had another little service and then everyone went to the church for a lunch. We stayed at the cemetery and watched while they buried her. Now that was weird. But my dad wanted to stay so we stayed with him. I am sure it was good for him, but when they put the casket in the hearse, I lose it. It always seems like such finality. But watching her be buried was so weird for me. I mean that's the final step. It's such a weird concept to me even though it happens every day it still seems weird to me to put people in the ground. But obviously death makes people think. I can't imagine losing a spouse or a child...I have been lucky, I am 30 years old and this is the first death in my family that I have had to deal with.

Annoyed...Part Deux

It's almost 10:00 on a Friday night. I am thirty years old and married, so I should be home. The girls that live upstairs on the other hand, SHOULD REALLY GO OUT MORE!!!!!!!! We live in a condo, there are five other condos in this building. Ours is the only 1 bedroom, the rest are two bedroom. I live on the first floor....my name is NOT Luca. Anyway, Todd had this place before we met. So I did not choose to live on the first floor, however it is what it is. The girls upstairs, I have no idea how old they are, but they are always home alone. They are old enough to be home alone, but not old enough to live alone. Their mom is never there. So I guess to fill the void they got this yappy little lap dog. The dog is very cute, but when it barks incessantly I want to drop kick it. And when these girls throw a ball on their hardwood floors for an hour at 9:00 on a Friday night, I want to drop kick them. And I do believe the stain on our ceiling is from the dog peeing on the floor and not being cleaned up right away. So now I have to repaint our celing. I just looked up one day and there it was. I had no idea what it was at first, so I took a marker and drew a couple of lines around the edges. I thought maybe something was leaking and I wanted to see if the spot was going to get bigger. It hasn't. This is just one of the many reasons I hate living in this condo.

I understand that they can't tiptoe around all the time, but sometimes it seems like they are trying to make a ton of noise. A couple of Saturdays ago they were making noise ALL day. I am not even exaggerating. I have no idea what they were doing, but I was ready to go ballistic after the first hour.

They also go out onto their patio to smoke and guess where they throw their cigarette butts! Give up? On the ground, all in front of our patio. And I am not talking about a couple here and there, I am talking about piles of cigarette butts.

Oh, and on the floor above them, like six people living there. Ugh!! I can't even handle it anymore. There has to be some sort of law against that. I don't know, like an occupancy law or something???

Condo living sucks ass! And I want a house now! A house with my own laundry room, and my own driveway and garage. A house where I don't have to listen to the people clomp around upstairs. A house with a yard where I don't have to worry about bumping into other people. It's all mine and I don't have to share my space with strangers.

Anyone want to buy a 1 bedroom condo??

Annoyed!

Here is another don't....Don't act like a jackass, especially at work.

I love my job. I like what I do, and I like MOST of the people I work with, at least I can tolerate most of the people I work with. I have made a lot of friends at work and still talk to some of them that I haven't worked with in 5 years. I tend to trust people until they give me a reason not to. Our department is split up by regions so our teams are fairly small. I was excited to finally sit by the people on my team. I always think it's going to be great but then it goes like the Real World's opening phrase. "What happens when people stop being polite and start getting real." Everything is good for the first couple of months and then the person you thought was cool starts showing their true colors. And then there's tension. And now in this technology era where no one has to talk to anyone to say how they feel, they take to their facebook page status to let you know that you pissed them off, even though when you did what pissed them off, you weren't even talking about them. So not only is this person paranoid and self involved, they have this sense of entitlement that makes you want to just scream at them to get over themselves. And here's a little tip. In this economy, you should be thankful you have a job. You should NOT be going into the VP's office and telling them that if there is no career advancement potential that you are going to have to look elsewhere. Here is what I would say to that, "Smell ya later, don't let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya!"

Oh and also, if someone invites someone else over you to go see a concert, there is probably a reason. But a mature person would just let it go. Not completely stop talking to someone because of it. This is the one reason I can't stand working with women. I love when I get to know someone I work with and we become friends, but it always ends in some sort of drama. And I hate that shit! And I especially hate it when I feel like I did something wrong even though I just keep my head down and do my work. I am so over it!

Oh and also, you can take your cryptic messages on FB and shove them where the sun don't shine!

Reality TV

I am reading Jen Lancaster's book Bright Lights, Big Ass and there is a chapter where she talks about the t.v. she watches and it got me thinking about what I watch. So out of curiosity I want to see a list of the shows I watch. I know it's mostly reality t.v. So let's see.

1. Dancing with the Stars
2. The Hills
3. Jon & Kate Plus 8
4. The City
5. Intervention
6. How I Met Your Mother...Love, love, love Neil Patrick Harris
7. Chelsea Lately..Not just on Mondays.
8. Real Housewives of New York, Orange County and Atlanta
9. Bad Girls Club
10. America's Next Top Model
11. Real World
12. Man Vs Food
13. Grey's Anatomy
14. The Office
15. ER..sometimes
16. What Not to Wear
17. Say Yes to the Dress
18. SuperNanny
19. Wife Swap
20. The Soup
21. Rock of Love
22. Keeping up with the Kardashians
23. Tough Love
24. Rock of Love Charm School
25. The Duel (Formerly known as Real World/Road Rules Challenge
26. LA Ink
27. The Bachelor...sometimes..It's not a must watch for me.

And right now I am seeing a commercial for Daisy of Love...Holy Train Wreck! I will definitely be watching that one if only for her little ticks that she seems to have.

So that's the list of what I can think of at the moment, and just from eyeballing it, it seems to be mostly reality t.v. I guess I am trying to figure out why I watch so much of it. Todd seems to ask me about once a week why I watch some of the shows I watch, and I don't really have a good answer. And he always says, "You're an intelligent woman, why do you watch this stuff?" I am not intelligent enough to give him a good answer. All I can say is, "I don't have to think about anything while I am watching these shows." That is true, especially now. I read my fair share of news websites and I watch the news in the morning and I can only take so much of that. Sometimes I am just pissed off after seeing the news. You can't be pissed off watching Rock of Love, I mean come on. So that's my defense!

Don't

So I think I will change the format of my blog. Not that it really follows any specific format, but it's possibly going to now. But I do have ADD when it comes to consistency on this. But I told my husband I wanted to write a book and it was just going to be called "Don't" and it would list all the things that people shouldn't do. And most of it would be common sense things like, "Don't drive in the left lane on the expressway if you are going 10 miles slower than everyone else." I was going to just start writing them down whenever I thought of them and see how many I could come up with. Who knows, I may not even be able to come up with enough to actually fill a book, but I am thinking I probably could. A LOT of things annoy me. I could probably get half of them at work alone. Granted some of them would take some explaining, but once it was explained people would be like "Duh, I get that and I don't even work there." Ok, so now that I have explained all of that I think I will start putting them on my blog. So every time I think of something it will go here. Here goes:

The aforementioned don't: Don't drive in the left lane on the expressway if you are going 10 MPH slower than everyone else...thought that was common knowledge.

Ok, so now that I am trying to think of them I can't. So when they return to my brain, I will be back. And trust me there are a ton floating around up there.